Jun. 19th, 2007

chavvah: (mystery and botulism)
[livejournal.com profile] stitchtowhere deserves credit for the origin of this thought, but it bears mentioning again:

Why is it that Bobby Flay acts like he invented fast food? All he ever does is make fries or grill stuff.

One of my favourite moments is when he pwns his Texan wife on the air by talking about how she told him she prefers gravy without onions, but GUESS WHAT? Bobby went to culinary school, and he knows best! Gravy should always have onions! Texans are dumb! HA HA HA. Whatever. I sincerely hope that Mrs. Flay was watching this episode from atop her kitchen counter, where she was being enthusiastically serviced by the pool boy. Or girl, should she be so inclined.

Right now he is, and I kid you not, making two types of Egg McMuffins--oh, pardon me, "Classic New York breakfast sandwiches." BullSHIT, Bobby Flay. Oh, and a Nutella and banana sandwich on cinnamon toast. They teach you that one in culinary school? He seriously just said, and I quote, "Cinnabons ain't got nothin' on us." Is that the level of quality he is striving for? Yikes.

My black olive and sundried tomato tapanade is highly delicious and does not resemble anything on the menu at Burger King. I should probably stay off the phone, since clearly Food Network Canada is hard up enough to call and offer me my own show ANY SECOND NOW. I'm up for the challenge. Jamie could be my loveable sous chef/straight man. I will call it "Bite Me," as an expression of how Bobby Flay has influenced me to be an artist in the kitchen through his endless search for culinary mediocrity.

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chavvah

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